Greetings adventurer!

This is Nick! The other guys made a terrible mistake and allowed me to write an extremely subjective blog for the website!

Tales From The Sarlacc is going to be a weekly blog for the site.  Will it be good? Oh, Odin of course it won’t!  It will be completely subjective and hopefully sprinkled with something halfway entertaining!  Let’s begin!

Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain has slowly become my primary video game entertainment over the last few weeks. I have been working at a snails pace through the main story so I don’t rush the experience. To do this I have been spending copious amounts of time on the side missions just to improve the staffing at my base of operations (Mother Base).  Making sure my departments are crewed not only by high quality individuals but arranging them so that their personality quirks are balanced for maximum efficiency and minimal tension.  I love this game.

That is why I am so nervous and hesitant about picking up Fallout 4 because everything I have heard about what you can do in the game is like a Siren’s song calling me to smash my vessel upon foreign shores.  Never to see Mother Base again.  I don’t know if I have the soul to split between two games of this caliber. I decided the only sensible action was to drop all side work and focus exclusively on the main story arc of MGS5.  It was time to bring down the corporeal thunder pain on all villainy.

I sneak-smashed through the enemy lines readying my body for the final confrontation with the games antagonist.  Oh, to clarify, “sneak-smashing” is not recognized by the community at large as a real tactic, but it’s one I think we all use in varying degrees during Metal Gear Solid games.  You intend to sneak get caught and just say fuck it while going Bazooka-Joe on anything that dares drum it’s heart.

Sunday night I took down the big bad. In a clash made song for bard’s to earn their income in tavern’s across the land. I did succeeded and was given revenge.  With a heaping amount of questions as to what actually happened in the story but that seems par for the course when I play a title written by Hideo Kojima. The credits begin to roll and I start prepping to purchase Fallout 4.


Then it happened.


The reason I had so many unanswered questions at the end of the game was because I wasn’t actually finished. The screen gloats it’s text at me.

“Part 2”

I am only halfway through the game.

Damn you.  You beautiful game.


Solidus · November 17, 2015 at 5:15 pm

Classic noob. We live in a post Avengers post credits post script postage paid world. And you thought you were done at the ending?

P’shaw. PEE-SHAW.

    Nick Johnson · November 17, 2015 at 9:16 pm

    You had me at “Classic”. What can I say? I grew soft in a world of 8 – 12 hour game play. Victory had nearly defeated me, but I did not forget the face of Final Fantasy!


    but seriously could you google average play times for me.. its killing me… dear Zeus, save me!

Leave a Reply

Avatar placeholder

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *